In my limited time as a writer, I don't know that I have ever really written about the new year in a form of reflection or resolution before.
I'm a huge fan of goals (insert link to previous posts) and reflections (insert link to previous posts) and surveys for that matter (insert link to previous posts) but they tend to take place in the dead of night when the house is silent and alcohol/caffeine is flowing or under the soft light of warm coffee shops and deadlines.
And most often on the eve of my birthday.
I've lost steam for this post and I need a nap. It's finally snowing and I'm nervous for what this next year might bring. 2011 (like any passage of time) has provided plenty of changes and moods and for the most part I hope 2012 is a bit easier. I need a change of scenery or a new outlook and more then ever therapy, so I hope 2012 gives me the bravery to make those possible.
I didn't get a kiss at midnight but drank too much so I wouldn't have to think about earlier that day. Where I laid my head in someone else's lap and when he gentle tucked my hair behind my ear and his fingers lightly brushed my tattoo reminding both of us that I loved someone else, I felt more then I had in a long time.
But feelings are fleeting, at least that's what I tell myself. So this moment will pass and I know I will eventually fall in lust with my husband again instead of just staying stuck in this minimal acquaintance state.
Jon said I just need a vacation.
My mom said I just need to keep taking my vitamins.
This post is brought to you by my slight hangover, general depression and the song "Save You" by Matthew Perryman Jones.
Tomorrow will be better.
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